As I start day #1 of my tiny little IVF advent calendar, I’m feeling excited. I know you're probably thinking she's excited over taking birth control pills?! Crazy right. I’m sure the fact that we are finally on our way to creating another tiny miracle has a little something to do with it.When I started this blog over two years ago, I was confident I was going to become a mommy. I knew the journey wasn’t going to be easy (or ideal for that matter), but I believed it to be possible. I had hope…I had faith…I had determination. Then came failure, after failure, …each time, chiseling away at any grain of confidence that remained.
As I sit here today writing this, officially a mommy of an almost 2 year old, I feel obligated to reinforce the need to persevere on this journey. I like to reference back to one of my favorite quotes by Sigmund Freud “One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.” If you’re still struggling, it may be hard to understand this at the moment. I know what you’re thinking, believe me. How can such a tough journey, filled with so much heartache ever be considered beautiful?
The truth is, all of it is beautiful…
Your development of strength as you move through disappointment and failure
Your connection and bond with “strangers” who understand
Your acquired tolerance of pain and ability to recover
Your unbreakable relationship with your significant other as you lean on each other for support
It’s all beautiful, even if you can’t see it right now- -
PUSH through this girl YOU GOT THIS!
Do I wish the stars would have aligned sooner for us? Absolutely! But when I consider the person I’ve become over the course of the hardest year of my life, I can’t help but feel thankful for my struggle. I am grateful beyond measure and I was more equipped to be a mother than ever before when that time came. Those who struggle with infertility learn not to take the little things for granted. As such, I am celebrating every .single. milestone.
I hope those of you still struggling will have the same opportunity to one day look back and appreciate the misery you gone through. Giving up is easy, BUT you’re stronger than that!
When I started this blog as a personal journal, documenting my journey to motherhood through assisted reproduction, I never (in my wildest dreams) could have imagined the impact it would have on others or the abundance of virtual/local friends it would bring to me. An exercise in therapy, turned place of encouragement and support for so many others just like myself.
This outlet and your readership has given this journey so much more purpose, and I’m truly grateful to have connected with so many beautiful people just by writing this blog. I’ve learned through this experience that in the infertility community, there are no strangers, only friends you haven’t met yet.
If you found your way here out of desperation, in search of hope, looking for a good laugh (or a good cry), wanting to feel understood, or simply out of curiosity…you’ve come to the right place. Dealing with infertility is so often a secret and shameful battle. You’re NOT alone! In fact, 1 in 8 people know exactly how you feel. Choosing to be an open book about my personal struggle to conceive was one of the best decisions I made during our infertility journey. Honesty and vulnerability has made way for new friendships, sanity and raised awareness throughout the past 3 years of our lives.
I truly believe we go through things for others. That said, I hope you will be inspired to share your story one day too…but for now I hope this blog is a source of support for you & I will continue to keep all of my infertility sisters in my prayers daily as you go through this journey of life.
